Freaky Tales Chords by Too $hort

[Start]

[Intro]
N.C.                                
These are the tales the freaky tales
N.C.                                   
These are the tales that I tell so well


[Verse]
  Db       E                     
I met this girl her name was Joan
    Db7                           E         
She loved the way I rocked on the microphone
     E                         
When I met Joan I took her home
        E                               
She was just like a doggy all on my bone
  Db          E                    
I met another girl her name was Ann
E                                     
All she wanted was to freak with a man
     E                         
When I met Ann I shook her hand
   Db                                
We ended up freakin' by a garbage can
                       E          
The next young freak I met was Red
  E                                         
I took her to the house and she gave me head
    Db             E              
She liked to freak is all she said
   E                                       
We jumped in the sheets and we broke my bed
Db              E                    
There's another girl her name is Mary
E                                        
Talked about sex and the girl acted scary
  Db            E                            
I heard she was freakin' for my homeboy Jerry
Db              E                             
Took her to the house and I popped that cherry
E                            
Young and tender sweet Denise
Db                         E             
Get her in the bed and the girl's a beast
  Db                      E          
I tell you homeboy if you get a piece
Db                              E                
She'll only start talking about signin' the lease
  E                                
I met this tender her name was Lori
   E                                   
An xrated movie wouldn't tell her story
    Db                E                
She had a twin sister her name was Lisa
    Db        E                             
And just like Lori she's a real dick pleaser
   Db           E                
My girlfriend's name was Michelle
    Db        E                             
Her booty was bigger than a tell on the well
       Db      E                          
When I freaked Michelle I freaked her well
    Db        E                             
Her pussy got hotter than the flames in hell
  E                                
I geed this girl her name was Tammy


[Chorus]
  Db                            E               
I didn't wanna do it 'cause the bitch was flammy
    Db         E                       
She had a best friend her name was Jane
  Db                           E             
I pulled her to the side and I spit that game
  E                                  
I met a lot of freaks in my life span
E                                      
Freaked one night with a girl named Pam
    Db        E                         
The very next day I saw her with her man


[Verse]
Db7      E                            
One week passed and I was in her again
  E                                 
I had an old tender her name's Janie
E                                        
She was thirtytwo and I was only eighteen
E                                    
She likes to freak she's just a fiend
   Db            E                             
It really didn't matter when I saw her in jeans
        E                       
I wanna big freak fat and slobby
     E                               
I'll kick on back and watch her mouth
Db          E                
Two tons of fun big mama jama
  E                       
A countrygirl from Alabama
  E                                
I met this freak her name was Betty
    E                                      
Her pussy got wet and it smelled like death
      Db7                 E             
I was tired as hell I was drippin' sweat
          Db                      E             
But I was all up in her tryin' to hold my breath
                    Db                E    
Bake and shake us I met this freak in Vegas


[Chorus]
    Db                E    
She said her name was Donna
          Db            E               
She was a filthy little freak from China
       E                     
I said I don't pimp or gigolo
           E                               
I'm havin' so much money I don't need a hoe
        E                                    
You can break yourself but you can't break me
    Db                      E        
You never met a player like hort baby
  Db                       E      
I knew a dick sucker named BettyJo


[Verse]
Db             E                               
Took her to my house and we did it on the floor
Db                           E            
The girl got freaky and I'll tell you more
        Db                E              
She was down on her knees beggin' to blow
      E                             
She's like another freak named Renee
    Db7                      E            
You get her alone and she'll make your day
Db                   E             
Like Burger King she knows the play
      E                                        
But a freak like Renee you can have it your way
              Db7   E               
These are the tales the freaky tales
Db                         E           
These are the tales that I tell so well
              Db        E           
These are the tales the freaky tales
E                                      
These are the tales that I tell so well
Db              E            
I met this girl thick as hell
E                                    
Only sixteen said her name was Linell
  Db7            E                     
I took her to my house I could not wait
    Db7                          E           
Her shit was much tighter than a central safe
E                                             
Let me tell you this since we're talkin' young
  Db          E                            
I met another girl said her name was Yvonne
Db                   E         
Always talkin' about havin' fun
     Db                        E       
Once again at the pad I had it goin' on
    Db      E                       
I'm Sir Too hort couldn't be no punk
    Db        E                     
I'm tryna get funky like female funk
            Db     E                     
So when you see me comin' or see me goin'
  Db      E                               
I keep my money let the hoes keep throwin'
Db                      E              
I once met a hooker she did it for free
       Db       E                     
On the foothill bust number fortythree
        Db         E                      
All the way in the back she was workin' me
       Db                    E               
Had my big beatbox and I was jammin' the beat
  E                              
I met this freak named Antoinette
Db                     E          
Macked on baby like an icecold vet
Db                              
Everythin' she had is what I get
           Db                                  
'cause I'm Too hort baby I don't play that shit
                        E            
I met another freak her name was Rita


[Chorus]
E                                        
Baby thought that hort just might eat her
  E                                       
I told her like this she can suck my peter
   E                                           
Or even go home 'cause I knew I didn't need her
Db                        E             
Scratched her name off my telephone book
Db                   E          
Never again I took a second look
           Db7                  E              
'cause the next young freak her name was Sharon
Db                    E             
She kept lookin' well I kept starin'


[Verse]
E                                       
Baby came through with my homeboy Darren
    E                                             
Her booty was stuffed in the jeans she was wearin'
Db             E         
She never left he cut out
  Db                         E            
I know you all know what I'm talkin' about
          Db          E                    
There's a freak named Shannon such a sinner
    Db                   E                    
She smokes that pipe and she's gettin' thinner
Db                      E           
Shannon is cool but her mind is gone
Db                    E       
One fat rock and it's goin' on
    E                                 
She had another buddy came by my place
E                                      
Thick ass bitch said her name was Grace
    E                                
She walked in the door workin' a lace
            Db7       E             B         
You shoulda seen that look that was on my face


[Chorus]
      Db        E                   
She's like this tender named Belinda
    E                                    
The homeboys call her Belinda the Blender
E                                
She gave head like she made it up
        E                                     
She was twenty years old with a big round butt
Db         E             
Had a girl like olive oil
    E                                       
Her father was rich and the girl was spoiled
     E                               
When she got mad her blood would boil
      Db              E                      
But I wrapped her all up like alluminium foil
Db    E               Db  E             
These ■ are the tales the ■ freaky tales
Db            E                        
These are the tales that I tell so well


[Verse]
E                                                    
Shake if you like Friday night it's goin' on Too hort
      E                         
Three weeks ago I met this freak
    E                                   
She followed me around like Mary's sheep
  E                                      
I hid around the corner and when she came
  E                                          
I grabbed her by the arm and I asked her name
    E                                        
She said it was Anita her man's in Santa Rita
  Db             E                           
I took her to my house and homeboy I geed her
Db              E                    
Sent her on her way the very next day
Db               E            
Playboy hort was ready to play
  E                                     
I bumped to this girl her name's Rosanne


[Chorus]
   E                                
We hit the motel and had it goin' on
E                               
Holiday Inn to the break of dawn
       E                               
When I took baby home I freaked her mom
  E                            
I knew this tender named Cherie


[Verse]
  Db                               E          
I took her to my house and let her freak on me
Db         E                    
Baby was a fan she loved my beat
      Db                                E           
But I wouldn't raise my leg and let her kiss my feet
  E                           
I met this freak named Yolanda
E                                      
Rolled baby doll like a brand new Honda
Db       E                   
I was on top she was up under
    E                                           
The bed hit the wall and it sounded like thunder
  E                                    
I once had a date with girl named Kitty
Db         E                            
She was so fine with her big fat titties
Db        E                         
All night long she was actin' shitty
            Db E         B                
So I macked on baby like I was Frank Nitti
E                                    
There's another girl her name is Rose
  Db          E                         
I use to ride baby like brand new Volvos
  Db        E                   
I never saw Rose wearin' clothes
        E                           
She's a pimp house pet ready to pose
      E                                      
I was ridin' down the street when i met Janet
    E                                          
Her booty was bigger than the whole damn planet
E                                   
Ass everywhere I just can't stand it
E                                     
Tried to pom it but I could not manage
  Db       E                       
I had this freak her name was Bunny
     E                                         
Said I'm the only man who ever called her honey
E                                
Everything I did to her was funny
  E                                   
I macked on bunny and I took her money
E                                
Eight tonight a date with Shirley
E                                        
She was real short and her hair was curly
Db         E                          
If you saw baby you'd like this girlie
Db7                       E            
She was so fine I went to get her early
E                                            
Shirley was freakin' like a girl named Rachel
    E                                     
Her bite was vicious and it sure was fatal
E                                
She liked to kiss all on my naval
E                                    
Those are her lips on top of my label
  E                                    
I knew another freak her name was Candy
E                                   
Real big lips and they came in handy
  E                                    
I smooth got worked and it was so dandy
  E                                        
I hooked the broad up with my homeboy Randy


[Chorus]
   E                       
He did me a favor in return
E                                         
Gave me a lizard said her name was Laverne
Db       E                   
Baby got tossed then I got on
  Db          E                                     
I grabbed the microphone and started singing my song
   E                         
My young homeboy heard me rap
    E                                    
And said he had way more freaks than that
     E                                        
So I told him like this they might be freakin'
    E                                  
But boy you never had that TP treatment


[End]